How to Better Regulate Your Emotions | Dr. Marc Brackett

April 20, 2026Dr. Marc Brackett psychology mental-health neuroscience science

TL;DR

Emotional intelligence is a learnable skill that involves recognizing, understanding, and effectively regulating your own emotions and those of others
Childhood experiences and socialization patterns, particularly how boys and men are taught to process emotions, significantly shape adult emotional capacity
Practical emotion regulation tools can be applied individually to improve emotional awareness before deploying them in relationships, work, and school contexts
The ability to label and name emotions with precision increases your capacity to regulate them and respond more effectively to situations
Gender socialization around emotions, especially the cultural messaging that boys should suppress feelings, creates lasting challenges in emotional expression and relationships
Developing emotional intelligence requires intentional practice and awareness of how your body signals emotional states before they escalate

Key Moments

0:00

Marc Brackett Introduction

2:55

Emotion Regulation and Emotional Intelligence Fundamentals

15:30

How Childhood Experiences Shape Emotional Processing

32:15

Gender Socialization and Emotional Expression in Boys and Men

48:00

Practical Tools for Emotion Regulation and Building Emotional Intelligence

Episode Recap

In this episode, Dr. Andrew Huberman speaks with Dr. Marc Brackett about the science of emotion regulation and the practical tools needed to develop emotional intelligence. Brackett, the founding director of Yale's Center for Emotional Intelligence, explains that emotional intelligence is not an innate trait but rather a set of learnable skills that can be developed throughout life. The discussion covers how individuals can increase their emotional awareness both through personal practice and within the context of their relationships, workplaces, and educational environments. A significant portion of the conversation focuses on how childhood experiences shape our current relationship with emotions. Brackett emphasizes that the way we were raised, particularly what we were taught about expressing or suppressing feelings, creates deep patterns that influence our emotional regulation as adults. He places particular emphasis on how boys and men are socialized differently around emotional processing and expression. Many men report being discouraged from displaying vulnerability or certain emotions during childhood, which can lead to difficulty accessing and communicating emotions in adulthood. This socialization pattern has profound implications for mental health, relationships, and overall well-being. The episode explores practical strategies for improving emotional intelligence, including techniques for recognizing emotional signals in your body, learning to label emotions with greater precision, and developing awareness of how your emotions influence your thoughts and behaviors. Brackett explains that the ability to accurately name and describe emotions is foundational to regulating them effectively. Rather than using broad categories like good or bad, developing a more nuanced emotional vocabulary allows for more precise understanding and management of internal states. The conversation also addresses how these individual practices can then be applied in relational contexts, improving communication and connection with others. Brackett discusses how emotional intelligence serves as a foundation for success in multiple life domains, from academic performance to professional leadership to personal relationships. The episode provides listeners with actionable insights they can implement immediately to better understand their emotional landscape and develop greater emotional resilience. Brackett's research and clinical experience inform practical recommendations that are grounded in neuroscience while remaining accessible and applicable to daily life.